Articles About Narcissism in Relationships

Will the Narcissist Come Back? Maybe…but then what?

The narcissist only returns again and again to ensure that you never move on from the pain he has caused you – and this is the ONLY reason. If you remember nothing else from what I tell you, you must remember that. The sociopath and narcissist will hoover for no other reason than to get

A Narcissist’s Hoovering is a Timeless Control Tactic

By Zari Ballard31 Comments

To a narcissist, hoovering is a timeless tactic for controlling a target, validating that control, and periodically checking an ex’s queue-status. And when I say “timeless”, I mean TIMELESS as in time is of NO consequence…time is NOT of the essence…time never runs out…and there’s no time like now to hoover “whomever I want because,

The Narcissist’s Motivation to Deceive- Part 2/2

By Zari Ballard26 Comments

In Part I of this article, I explained how the narcissist has but one true cause that rules his life and that is to see what he can get away with. He truly knows nothing else. Everything he does/says throughout the course of the day – and throughout the duration of the relationship – is

The Narcissist’s Motivation to Deceive (Part 1/2)

By Zari Ballard31 Comments

Narcissistic lovers and partners are really as simple as they are complicated. We spend a whole lot of time trying to figure it all out…why they do what they do and say what they say. We agonize over their willingness to cheat and how they so easily can lie about it. We demand to know

How the Married Narcissist Plays His Victims

By Zari Ballard144 Comments

The narcissist who is married is probably the most prolific of all the other narcissists because of the game he has ultimately chosen to play. Indeed, the married narcissist can live in suburbia with the wife and kids and, at the same time, carry on one or more relationships outside of the marriage without appearing

Getting Over the Narcissist One Small Choice at a Time

By Zari Ballard77 Comments

The hardest part about leaving a narcissist is the thought that we’re never going to get over it. Even though we’ve been subjected to a zillion silent treatments and disappearances (and survived!), we figure that once it’s really over, we might as well curl up in the fetal position and get comfortable because that’s where

How Narcissist’s Triangulate: Death Of a Heart By a 1000 Cuts

By Zari Ballard85 Comments

Triangulation is a passive-aggressive manipulation tactic used by narcissists and sociopaths to instill feelings of jealousy and insecurity in their partners. It’s a tactic by which narcissists can create thrilling illusions of popularity, making themselves out to be far busier and more socially-in-demand outside of the relationship than they really are. This narcissistic strategy, like

Narcissists, Money, & The 5-Star Deception

By Zari Ballard44 Comments

I’ve never really given much credence to clinical narcissist types – classic, somatic, cerebral etc. – because, to me, when we’re talking about the narcissistic mentality, it’s all the same albeit slight variations depending upon the circumstance. Now, having said that, I do absolutely believe that there exists two very specific non-clinical types – that

Loving the Narcissist is NOT Your Destiny

By Zari Ballard25 Comments

Even though you feel intense love for a narcissistic partner, you must understand that loving the narcissist is not your destiny. Our codependency to hope (that incessant feeling of Oh my God, this just has to get better!) keeps us tethered to a life that we sadly feel committed to fixing instead of changing –

Narcissists & The Soul Mate Effect

By Zari Ballard79 Comments

In a relationship, a narcissist will use a variety of emotional manipulation tactics to hook, re-hook, and then string-along his partner. One of the most effective of these tactics is one that I call the soul mate effect. Along with its sister manipulation tactic future faking, the soul mate effect makes up the stickiest portion