How the Married Narcissist Plays His Victims

By Zari Ballard

The narcissist who is married is probably the most prolific of all the other narcissists because of the game he has ultimately chosen to play. Indeed, the married narcissist can live in suburbia with the wife and kids and, at the same time, carry on one or more relationships outside of the marriage without appearing the least bit stressed about it. His abilities to lie on-the-fly, to convince all partners (including the spouse) that his intentions are always on the up-and-up, and to be, seemingly, in two places at once are unsurpassed and put him at a pathological level above the typical narcissist.

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Through my phone consultations and correspondence with both women and men, I have been able to make the following observations:

A married narcissist will typically – but not always – be an online predator so that he can keep the extramarital affairs long-distance. He will have profiles on numerous dating sites that give his relationship status as either divorced or separated (when he, obviously, is neither).
A married narcissist typically – but not always – will be a high-level narcissist, meaning that he is a narcissist with a good job and usually a good deal of money. At the very least, he is self-sufficient. I call this the 5-Star Deception. Having money makes it much easier for the narcissist to carry on multiple affairs or one that’s long-term without tipping off the wife. He may have a job that requires that he often travel out of town (and even out of the country) on a regular basis. Having money also means he can quickly book vacations or send flowers and/or extravagant gifts to appease the lover should she become disenchanted with the narcissist’s mind-boggling and hurtful behaviors. He may even play the most devious version of The Cell Phone Game and have two phones – one for each of his deceitful lives.
A married narcissist always love-bombs his target more intensely than the typical narcissist simply because he’s under more of a time constraint. The sooner he hooks her, the less chance that finding out he’s still married will cause her to leave the relationship. Like any other narcissist, the end game is always to get away with the ruse – any ruse – for as long as he possibly can. Some women have been involved with married narcissists as the mistress for as long or nearly as long as the narcissist has been married.
The target of a married narcissist may not initially suspect that this new guy is married because of his ability to spend so much time with her. After all, how can a guy be married and still be able to hop on the next plane out at the drop of a hat? OR how can he be married if he’s able to take off for a week to the Caribbean without appearing the least bit stressed about it? OR how can he be married if we’re always on the phone together? Because the narcissist compartmentalizes every aspect of his pathetic life, he can be completely stress-free with whomever he’s with!
A narcissist marries for many reasons but the biggest reasons are that being married to a wonderful woman is good for appearances and it makes him feel (for a second) as if he’s actually a normal guy. The novelty wears off, however, and quick. That being said, the narcissist is rarely willing to give the marriage up because he feels justified in having both! After all, if all it takes to keep the ruse afloat on either side is to tell a few lies…well, shit! That’s easy! Don’t ever forget…a narcissist’s entire life is all about what he can get away with day to day.

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When the long-term, already-hooked mistress/target finds out about the marriage (and she always does), the N will likely explain that he was just in the process of filing for divorce when they met but the affair simply distracted him. Now that she knows, he’ll get right on that! He’ll spew his narcissistic word garbage, insisting that the marriage is one of convenience only (“We haven’t slept together in years!”) and that his wife is a psycho who cheats on him and he’s been working with a lawyer to make sure she doesn’t take him for a ride. The truth is that the wife is living the same life as the mistress…a life full of suspicions, silent treatments, and some incredible (but obviously believable) future-faking. If the narcissist is especially pathological, he may even, just for fun, deliberately triangulate one woman with the other.

What I find particularly distressing are the stories where the married N actually convinces a long-distance lover to move to the city where he’s lives under the premise that a divorce is imminent (which it never is) or that he’s already divorced or that he’s now separated. The truth is that the wife has probably caught on or, at the very least, suspects there’s a lover and the move, for him, is for convenience only because he can no longer just hop on a plane. I’ve heard from countless women who’ve moved clear across country – and even across continents – at the narcissist’s request only to be given the silent treatment immediately upon arrival. A married narcissist will even deliberately target a married woman, convincing her to leave her husband for the new relationship and then disappearing himself soon after.

Interestingly enough, 99.9999% of the women that write to me who are involved with a married narcissist adamantly insist that they never – not in a million years – would have ever thought they’d be involved with a married man or cheat on their own husbands. It simply wasn’t part of their nature. Moreover, in as much as it causes them heartache to know she exists, not a single one has ever really bashed the wife. Why? Because deep down anyone involved with a narcissist knows that this guy is a fucking liar wherever he goes and to whomever he’s with at the moment. Typically, whether you experience the relationship as a wife or as a mistress, you eventually come to understand that the “other woman” is just like you.

So, for those who wonder why a mistress or wife continues to stay with the narcissist knowing what she knows, the answer is that the narcissist is the same person to each! He lies with the same believable demeanor and makes the same promises and will insist to one that the other is a psycho that he just can’t seem to get rid of…..it goes on and on. Both the wife and the lover are victims and in both cases, the victim wants to believe that this person that they love is telling the truth. It’s a codependency to hope that will get us in trouble almost every time.

Now, to be clear, this article isn’t about the married partner who has been monogamous for ten years and then fucks up and is sorry for it. While I certainly don’t condone that behavior, I have to make clear that there’s a difference. As we all know, narcissism isn’t about just one single behavior…it’s about many, many behaviors. We come to recognize these behaviors as narcissistic tactics and this is why those who suspect that their lover or husband is a narcissist are always right. If he is with you, you can guarantee that there is some woman somewhere getting the silent treatment. The married narcissist is very good at what he does or he wouldn’t be a married narcissist!

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144 Comments

Judy Peterson
June 24, 2018 at 1:35 am Reply

I would have recommended your great article, but you ruined it with the unnecessary and unprofessional profanities!
- Zari Ballard
  June 30, 2018 at 12:15 am Reply
  
  Hi Judy,
  
  Since I write from my own experience and how I felt going through what I did, I believe the profanities are completely necessary and are completely in context. As for being unprofessional, my blog is personal so I wasn’t worried about that and I’m still not. I write the words that describe what the majority of people who deal with narcs are thinking. If you haven’t felt any of that, then maybe you weren’t/aren’t with a narc. Thank you for stopping by though:)
  
  Zari:)
Steve
June 20, 2018 at 7:14 am Reply

Hi Zari,

After four years and four cycles of relationships with the same N I’ve suffered yet another breakup (the fourth) after 5 months of being back together. Only this time I’ve started counselling and was recommended ‘When Love is a Lie’. I read it one go and then moved onto ‘When Evil is a Pretty Face. Thank you for these wonderful books I finally understand what’s been happening.

My relationship with N started 4 years ago we belong to the same voluntary organisation. She is married and I am 13 years her senior. When we met it was fabulous. She was gorgeous, confident, vivacious and gave me something I’d never had before that spark that you’ve finally found your soul mate. I was smitten. We broke up 3 times mainly because I couldn’t understand why when she was telling me how unhappy she was at home, her husband was impotent and she only stayed with him for the business they run together and the daughter who is 18 this year. She wouldn’t leave him even though she said she truly loved me and life was perfect when we were together. However there were always hints of other men which I couldn’t figure out. Of course the sex was mind-blowing for us both.

So to the last cycle which has just ended. It was me that suggested a drink together 5 months ago after she had seen me and we talked about an issue with the organisation we’re in. After that first meeting I told her I didn’t care she wouldn’t leave her husband I accepted her reasons and just wanted her back in my life. I also accepted our conversations were always centred around her and what she was doing.

The first 2 months we’re magical and as texting was our main means of contact the texts were loving and full of what we meant to each other. We saw each other about twice a week the sex was still fantastic. At one point she even asked me to marry her until I pointed out she already had a husband. However she kept mentioning in a subtle way towards the end of the first two months the other men she was in contact with which all seemed innocent with plausible reasons why she was in contact with them, but my anxiety and the permanent knot in my stomach started again. I now realise this was the start of managing down my expectations of the relationship.

I’d been away on holiday with my daughters and our first meeting since I’d been away we were both really looking forward to it but she mentioned another man. My alarm bells went off and I challenged her. At that point the relationship changed, the loving texts started and continued to grow fewer in number her chatty phone calls to me stopped. I couldn’t believe the change after all we had said we meant to each other. I’d accepted that I could only see her when she wanted because of her marriage but she was in complete control of every aspect of our relationship and really was cutting down our contact.

I found myself completely in a daze wandering around my home with phone in hand waiting for a text. My children were very concerned that I looked ill. I just had that feeling again as in the previous times that something was definately ‘wrong’. I asked her a few times if we could go back to the way things were in the first two months. She reluctantly said yes and the next text would be worse. This carried on until a few weeks ago it ended as she was starting to subject me to the silent treatment again. During our 4 cycles of relationship she would never ever reassure me of her love and would get quite nasty and spiteful that I was being negative, but she would demand and expect reassurance from me.

Normally at this point I would have been begging her to keep the relationship going but having read your books and having so many a-ha moments. You listed 13 points that describe a Nacissist she met 12 of them in some fashion. I’m keeping my distance. My head is telling me I’m doing the right thing. My Children even say she’s a narcissist.

I’m beside myself though and very sad that once again it’s ended. Despite agreeing its over she is now texting me again asking if I’m Ok and then telling me its over again in such a cold manner. It feels like there are two seperate people texting me. I can’t go no contact because of the organisation so I’ve been trying the techniques of grey walling that my counsellor suggested. So I’m getting a cycle of texts saying ‘ok it’s over’ followed by ‘are you ok?’ Or just chatty friendly ones followed by asking me in a clinical way to explain why it’s over. I guess this is the hoovering phase?

Every fibre of my being wants to be back with her and I’m still in love with her and I’m struggling a lot with that. I know it’s going to be very hard when we professionally have to meet. My heart is telling me she can’t be a narcissist and to try again!!

Your book title ‘When Evil is a Pretty Face’ is spot-on and should be read by all men in a similar situation to mine.

I just hope I’m right that she is a narcissist as I wake up like today doubting it.???

I hope I can forget about this one day and have a normal loving relationship.
Aneta
May 15, 2018 at 4:51 pm Reply

Hello, ive been with a married man for 3 years. I found out he was married about 8 months into the relationship. He is 13 years older reaching 40. How did i not find out sooner ? Becaouse he is a perfect lier. At first he was telling me he couldnt take me to his place becaouse his parents live with him and he has respect in a way that he will only bring a woman home if he was 100% sure of getting married.. okay okay i suspected something was off . After 8 months of trying to unlock his phone i done it and thats how i found out about the wife and a 4 year old child… i went mad and this was the begining of my anger anxiety and depression. He promised and swore hes getting divorced in 6 months time. AND that the pregnacy scan text from his wife is her sisters. I belived and i feel ashamed. 6 months time there is no divorce but i mange to unlock his phone again and read a text from his wife something about a baby boy!!! O my god then i knew it was theirs and the boy was already about 4 months….. i kicked him out i swore i cried i went crazy when he started to say that the wife is looking after her sisters baby…
Of course there were many times where apparantly i upset him.and he just went silent ignored me and i was going more crazy… it was always everything his way and i always had to be available for him and that was my choice too to nkt have anyplans incase he turns up… no christmas no new year was ever spend together when i cried and asked him and tired to explain hes hurting me. Of course all this time he kept and still is promising me hes getting divorced….but he says its just so difficult coz the wife wants to fuck him up etc. Hes asking me to wait 1-2 years more. And they of course do not have sex since she got pregant… she got pregnant about 3 months into our being together..
So hear i am now… he threatend me .. he hit me once when he went mad for some.stupid thing. he says if i want to leave him.i will have to leave the country. At the moment i started taking anti depressants and im waiting to see a psychotherapist. Im a different person than i was. I love him even though its embarissing how can i love and forgive him so much. He promises i will be his wife and we will have kids anf that he knows he hurt me but he will make me happy etc. The last and worst thing that he done was 3 months ago.. i fell pregnant how stupid of me i know… i wanted to keep it he didnt . He had so many reasons why not yet. But i wanted to have the baby i said i dont want anythig from him etc and i ended up having that abortion after cancelling one appoitment i had to book another one and he took me there… when i think about this i still cry.
Its so much that has been happening in the last 3 years i would have to write a book… im very sad and i cant sleep at night . In the mornings i cant wake up. I just dont know why he is doing this to me and at the same time swears he loves me and cares..
Two weeks ago we had an argument i got upset becaouse he promised me two nights in a row that hes coming and then he didnt even text me and i was left waiting. I got angry.. for the like 20th time i said i want my house keys back. He said no get lost and he swore on me very nasty things. I asked couple of more times for the key he said he will give it back well he didnt and then he just ignored me and said hes going holiday becaouse im giving him too much headache. I have decided then that that is it. I changed the locks . The same day i changed the locks after a week of not contacting he sends me a text saying hes suprised i dont ask for the keys and that he misses me. I texted him.back and said i dont need the keys anymore and said that i am done with him and not to contact me again. He started going crazy calling me like 50 times texting . I ignored , next day i blocked him . He started texting me from a different phone asking me to come to the country hes in that he will book me a ticket that hes very sorry that i mean so much for him and that i know we will never brake up and i should just stop being upset . Oh my god i lost again . I text him.i speak with him.on the phone, not like nothing happened he knows im upset but hes saying everything he knows i want to hear,, even more. On one side i knownits all lies and bullshit but on the other i still have hope that maybe hes being honset… I dont know why im so weak why i dont have the strengh . He done so many bad things to me he hurt me so badly and i dont understand why i dont hate him.. i have read all your books i just finished narcissist free. They are very helpful but i just think im different .. weak…. i want to be with him.. i think im loosing my mind plus he keeps saying that im not right on my head but i know coz if i was normal i would leave him long time ago. Please help Zari.
- Zari Ballard
  September 29, 2018 at 1:47 am Reply
  
  Dear Aneta,
  
  Oh my goodness…you seem so sad! Listen girl, you need to know that YOU CAN DO THIS. If you’ve read my books, then you know what I am going to say or what I would say. I find that recovery is all about changing your perspective, seeing the relationship for what it is and knowing that it simply isn’t sustainable. We can love someone but know that they are so bad for us that it just can’t be! Do you understand this? There is no easy fix and it does take some strategizing.
  
  Now, its been a few months since you wrote. If you can re-read your post and see that today is no different than the day you wrote this on my website, then you know it simply must end. He doesn’t deserve to get in your head like that. It’s not about being “weak” because we all know what that feels like….you do have the power to change things, to stand up for yourself without reacting emotionally. He knows exactly how to create the spell that only you can break. This man is a complete dog….I know that you know that he is not going to get a divorce and that he is cheating on his family. It has to stop.
  
  He will keep you around until the end of time and you deserve to be FIRST not second. Please understand this. You are not “weak”, you just need the spell to be broken! You can’t do this indefinitely sister, you just can’t.
  
  Big Hugs!…xo
Shelly L
May 3, 2018 at 12:12 am Reply

I found this page thru Pintrest…I am the wife of a N…we split because he asked me to leave as he realized that I’d figured out what he was and wouldn’t put up with it anymore, so to him I was no longer worth anything. He had already kicked me out 3 times in the past couple years stating that he thought I didn’t love him anymore so I should just leave, then would beg me to come back stating he didn’t remember any of it as due to his health problems getting worse his mind was going crazy, so to keep up this facade, he signed over medical POA to me saying he didn’t think he’d live long…he has plenty of money, but I wasn’t interested in that and he knew it, so used my caring personality to get what he wanted.

We were in an open relationship because when I met him I was just out playing after years from a divorce and raising kids on my own without anyone in my life, so just wanted some adult time and wasn’t expecting to fall for anyone, but when it happened I didn’t want to change his playboy ways, so allowed him to play and we were swingers having parties and such until after about a year he started to get jealous of me and other partners, so then I stopped playing even though he didn’t. Anyway, he continued to play the ill, mentally forgetful poor me thing to keep me around and it worked for a while, but after a particularly difficult weekend with him acting like he had complete alzheimer’s, he later told me he was a very good actor and that 90% of it was faked….that told me that not only was he doing this in public (acting like he was out of it) he was doing it to me as well, so about a week later he realized I was looking to let him end it, so he did so. Now he’s giving me the silent treatment, but I am glad as I don’t message him either. I am waiting on his next move, which I assume will be divorce papers, but haven’t gotten anything yet and it’s been over a month.

I just want out with no issues, so am playing it low key, not telling him he is bad or anything to hurt his ego because I don’t want or need his drama and I know cutting the communication is hurting him the most, so that satisfies me. I am over him as I realize that there isn’t really the person I fell in love with there, it is someone I don’t even know, so I am not really distressed, just wanting to move on with my life.

I am poor and was basically when I met him, I’m just glad I met one of his prior gf’s who warned me that he was grooming me and would try to put me into a financial situation where i depended on him solely, so I wouldn’t let him talk me into selling my car so he could buy me a new one, which would of course be in his name, and i wouldn’t quit my job for him, which distressed him also, as he kept saying he’d pay me much more to be there and take care of him, but it wasn’t just that easy and I knew it, he wanted me to earn it, and I mean like really working 12 hour days doing stuff for him and treating him like a king that he thinks he is.

He is a retired military Master Sergeant, both medically and regular pay, he makes over 8k a month, but I won’t see any of it and I don’t care. He uses it to buy people all the time until they realize that whatever they do is never good enough for him and he wants to pay them pennies for their worth so they leave…he can’t keep friends….that was one sign and there were many others (never physically abusive, just mentally, but he did lock me in a room once for a short time 2 hours or so and got angry one night and fired off 13 rounds from his gun into a door in the bedroom while I was in the kitchen). He went to the hospital for a psych eval and was released because he can fool almost anyone, he is also on high doses of methamphetamines (he somehow got diagnosed with Dejerinnne-Roussy syndrome which causes pain on one side of the body after a stroke) but I think most of it was faked and he has been doing so for over 20 years, the docs have been trying to get him off the meds but he went to CA to see a specialist there and fooled him, although they just got wind of it and are no longer going to see him, so who knows how he’ll get his meds now as VA won’t do it for him and our state is pushing to stop them altogether, but not my problem anymore)….I knew quite some time back that he was borderline Narc, but didn’t realize until recently how bad he really was, but once researched, I realized it and am now just trying to be free So, now I’m just telling my story hoping this helps those that might be in a similar situation and not see it for themselves as I really thought he loved me and just wanted to play with others to help alleviate his pain a little and that the others meant nothing to him, but I was wrong, they are all his supply to feed off of and he needs them! So he can have them and I will no longer be one of them ever again. Thanks for listening….
- Zari Ballard
  September 17, 2018 at 3:24 pm Reply
  
  Hi Shelly L,
  
  My ex-husband (not the narc of my books) but my son’s father was a Master Sergeant and he was just as you describe. I noticed, during my seven year marriage to the Army, that most – if not all – of the higher ups in the military are like this. The Army breeds them this way. You were in a very dangerous situation and I am grateful you are free. Thank you for sharing and I apologizing for seeing your story so late…..xo
Teddi
April 7, 2018 at 6:08 pm Reply

Oh my God, I am the wife. 15 years married and 17 together. When I first discovered an email where he was trying to start an affair I gave him a choice to decide if he wanted to be married or not He said he wanted to work it out with me. Things had not been good and regardless of the reasons there was narcissistic injury. So by way of digging and sifting through years of information, it turned out to be much worse than I had originally thought. He had a way of communicating secretly that almost looked like normal work. I had experience in software development so I knew what was normal behavior vs. not. I would see him doing the strangest thnigs and then I’d see a window popup with another person on the screen. This happened over and over and every time I asked him he would lie, make me sound or feel crazy or just spew awful things to me. The worst part, besides the gas lighting that almost killed me, was the denial of truth. We are separated now and he still denies it. I have a video of him on his phone with a woman without a top on. I have his computer code that validates it all, but still he lies. I am pretty much resolved to never hearing the truth. I am quite certain now that he has been doing this since we met. Dr. Jeckyll and Mr. Hyde.

There is so much more to this story. To say that I was left a shell of my former self would be an understatement. I truly believe that he tried very hard to get me to kill myself. Most people don’t understand and if you try to explain they think you’re crazy. The smear campaign was started earlier and he then ran the full campaign as we ended the marriage. I have only heard from one family member and none of our mutual friends. He pegs me as the abuser. Masters of lying and deceit, he will do anything to not have to face himself and have his secrets exposed. How anyone believes him is beyond me. Why would he his son with his his crazy wife? The problem with these Narcs is that if you step back a little and watch things never add up. They will eventually slip and out themselves because their egos are so big they cannot possibly do anything wrong.

Thank God I wrote in my journal. It was the only thing that saved my sanity. I’m still struggling with it all. I have had thoughts of ending it all just so the pain will stop. Their hooks go deep and you have to be careful because the minute you feel like you can breathe again they appear. i am wondering if I will ever find peace again. I am wondering if I can ever trust again.
Nikki
March 19, 2018 at 9:18 pm Reply

I am married…. met a married man on a cheating hookup site…
where to start… this was my first affair…
he told me he was married… for 6 years.. had a daughter with her…
we text each other for a few weeks then decided to meet…. I instantly liked him when we first met in person… we didn’t have sex the first meeting… but he told me the next few weeks were going to be crazy…. we met a second time… we had sex… after he proceeded to tell me he had a friends wedding that coming weekend… bachelor party… then wedding… and he won’t be free until the following weekend… we continue to text one another … he sends me a pic of the bachelor party weekend of him having a great time… then sends me a pic of him in his tux…
we continue to hookup the following weekend… as time goes on… he paints this great picture about himself… works for the government as a satellite specialist (which is true— but I doubt it’s as glamorous as he describes)… plus he still active in the army… he’s a Sargent… etc…
wife is a pretty young blonde… cute daughter…
complains his wife never helps with the daughter… or cleans the house… he does all the cleaning… laundry.. taking care of the daughter.. etc..
Now the meetings we have is on his turf.. when he’s free.. his way or we don’t meet…
Well one day I stumble upon his grandmother’s fb Page (now his mom has mental issues and his grandmother raised him as her own) so she refers to him as her son…. and I see the pic he sent me in the tux…. then I see him in the same tux with the other groomsmen … but his is different from all of theirs… HES THE GROOM!!! Then I see pics of him and his new bride!!! —- he met the weekend before his wedding …. we continue this affair… catch more lies… he talks about his daughter … he’s so proud etc.. she looks like him.. (she don’t loook anything like the pretty blonde young wife) … whom he has said he’s been married to for 6 years and his daughter is 3! —- now our affair is going a year… and one day his grandmother posts a picture of a sonogram!!!! And says her son is expecting his second and his wife is expecting her first child!! —- he never told me about the pregnancy.. and his daughter is from a previous relationship…. that he lied about…
we still chat and meet… he still hasn’t told me about the baby… which she is due in a week!!! I go to his house to meet him while she’s at work… I think wow how is he going to hide this baby??!!!! Then he messages me the other day…. says his mother in law is building a town house near them and her home in another state sold sooner than expected… and she’ll be moving in with themuntil the townhouse is finished in July!! And we won’t be able to meet st his house until then!! (Maturity leave) … text book lying, cheating narcissist?!?
Healingmysoul
February 1, 2018 at 7:57 am Reply

Hi Zari,
This is the only place where I found something about being involved with a married narc.

The narc I was involved with is my schoolmate. Met after 25years online. Both married. Am happily married. Never ever in my remotest dreams did I think I will be involved with anyone. My hubby is my best friend…my life my everything n yet it happened.

The usual drill…love bombing, devalue n during one long silent treatment last August I started googling and found out he is a covert narc.
I decided to leave. And am 4 months no contact now. Am trying to heal n my hubby helps me a lot. He is godsend.
But i cannot go complete NC cuz his wife is my friend.
Earlier whenever we had a fight he used to ask me to send courtesy msgs so that his wife isn’t suspicious as to why am not texting him.
But from the time I told him I won’t put up with his crap if he continues the emotional abuse, he never mentioned anything about sending msgs to the wife. (Meaning he must have taken care of it by doing what they do best LYING)….

1. Am so stressed thinking what he might have told his wife (though the wife speaks to me sometimes and I speak very less, trying to avoid as much as I can).

2. Am also worried about the smear campaign cuz we have tons of mutual friends, their wives, kids… since we are schoolmates. See if he tells the truth I can handle it, am strong enough, but he wont, what if he destroys my reputation? You might think I care about what ppl think of me…trust me I didn’t/don’t…i don’t give a damn… That’s the reason a lot of toxic ppl hate me n I just live my life n do my thing…but these ppl can be so convincing n nasty…I think am a bit weak from bring infected by him and I want to get back my I don’t give a damn attitude back. Please help.

I have always been a happy go lucky person. Bright, dynamic, bold, beautiful, run a successful business,am an empath and I was so full of love n life. And some girls hated me for being me not confirming to the social norms… Hubby n I decided early on that we don’t want kids and I have been bullied for that too. Not that I care. But you know people here just wait to lap up gossips and rumors. They are miserable and can’t see anyone having a good life.

3. Am struggling to get back the old me. Don’t know how to forget and cope up with the fact that when I was being devalued, when I was trying to fix the relationship he was grooming someone else. It’s so painful and embarrassing, that I was made a fool cuz am nice? Cuz I cared?

What do I do? The ghosts of triangulation, the fear of smear campaign. Show me the way please.
Please help.
- Zari Ballard
  March 7, 2018 at 11:14 pm Reply
  
  Hi HealingMySoul…you and me, I think we need to talk. Please consider booking some time. You CAN get back to the old you and it’s amazing to feel it creep back. The old you has always been there, it’s just been a little clouded that’s all. These people do not matter, as you know. I speak with so many women just like you. The husband is always an awesome guy but the narc takes over their MIND. There is a way back with no fear sister. I hope we can talk it out…there is a way to be free:)…xoxo

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144 Comments

Judy Peterson

Zari Ballard

Steve

Aneta

Zari Ballard

Shelly L

Zari Ballard

Teddi

Nikki

Healingmysoul

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