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A Sociopath Exposes the Narcissist – (Part 2/3)

narcissist-fakeNarcissists and sociopaths use very specific strategies to manipulate victims and streamline the codependency of just about anyone who gets close to them.  In the first part of this article series, A Sociopath Exposes the Narcissist (Part 1), I described a website/blog written by a female sociopath for sociopaths that discusses everything about how sociopaths think, manipulate, and calculate the demise of others. Since I personally believe that narcissists and sociopaths are cut from the very same cloth ( a comparison that smacks of an insult to a sociopath), I am going to offer up, in this article, some actual content written by this self-described/self-diagnosed sociopath relative to compartmentalization. Again, compartmentalization is how narcissists and sociopaths justify their behaviors and actions within their own twisted minds. It is how they organize the strategies that, in effect, dictate how they will treat the people who love them as well as anyone who crosses their path and could possibly serve a purpose.

I’m offering this content relative to the three questions that are always at the forefront of every victim’s mind in the aftermath of a relationship with a narcissist: how narcissists juggle relationships, how narcissists can so easily pretend to love us one minute and then so obviously hate us the next, and why narcissists always return ( hoover back). The underlying message of the answers, taken from a post on this particular blog, presents some very scary shit and basically proves that my, yours, everyone’s analysis of these reptiles (as one of my readers so aptly described her own!) is correct.  Moreover, I think sometimes that we actually do need to hear it from the horse’s mouth in order to really wrap our heads around deliberately despicable behaviors that cause so much pain. Basically it comes down to one question: How do they do it?

Now, keep in mind that whether this content is contrived to appease non-narcissists/sociopaths, I can’t be sure… but it sure makes sense to me! So, here we go….

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How can narcissists lie so easily, juggle numerous relationships, and keep it all straight so that one relationship rarely finds out about the other?

The answer, from the mouth of a sociopath/narcissist: For me, not only is Game Theory one fashion of handling life, but the concept of compartmentalization.  As many people have commented, trying to keep everything in order (in regards to the lies, half-truths, manipulations, “games,” etc.) would be exceedingly difficult.  And it would be, if the sociopath’s mind operated as a normal person’s.  Everything in my mind is organized sort of like folders and folder groups that you might find in, say, Windows Explorer; everything has its place.  When a situation presents itself, or I am with a certain friend(s), I simply “open” up that folder and behave accordingly.  When one’s mind is organized in such a way that no thought co-mingles with others, you don’t have the problem of “remembering all of the lies,” because you have everything you need neatly stored away, waiting to be accessed at the right time. This same concept of compartmentalization applies in all walks of life, whether it be love, friendships, work, etc.  Another quality of this is enabling oneself to keep track of friend circles and ensuring that none of these circles cross in any way; this can allow for you to more easily adapt to any number of given situations per friend circle: a different personality, find another lover (in addition to, or instead of, one you may already have).  I find that I am in many different circles, but almost as a ghost; I can walk in and out of these circles almost unnoticed and not missed.  I was once described by a teacher as, “a loner who is never alone.”

How is it possible for narcissists to pretend they love their partners when they actually could care less?

The answer, from the mouth of a sociopath/narcissist: Sociopaths seem to be exceptionally good at compartmentalizing, which would explain why it is possible for him both to have cared (and perhaps still care) for you very much but seem to not be at all interested in you now. A good way for normal people to understand the extent to which this works is to think of a vivid dream, perhaps an anxiety dream in which you dream of things that need to happen, projects that need to get done, problems that need to get solved. During the dream you get very caught up in the urgency of things, whatever it is that you are dreaming about becomes very important to you, you can’t imagine a world in which this was not a primary concern for you. When you wake up from the dream there are still lingering feelings of the dream. Perhaps you just have the feeling that you need to do something, or maybe you actually remember specifics of what you supposedly “need” to do. Within the first fifteen minutes or so of wakefulness, however, you eventually realize that it was just a dream, that you really don’t have to worry about those things at all, and so you continue living this other life and quickly forget about the dream life. That is how much sociopaths can compartmentalize. The dream world never fully goes away, maybe they remember some of it, or something will remind them of it, but for the most part it and the feelings felt are a faint memory. Those feelings associated were “real” in that they reflect how the sociopath would feel under the circumstances of the dream, but those circumstances just turned out not to be true.

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Why do narcissists always hoover their way back (at some point) after a discard?

The answer, from the mouth of a sociopath/narcissist:  A lot of people ask me why a sociopath who has ended a relationship would still go through a great deal of effort to ensure that contact is never cut off completely.When sociopaths are involved in any serious relationship, they become a special version of themselves just for that person. I think the sociopath’s desire to check in is a desire to reconnect with that person that he once was, the same way that people might nostalgically flip through photo albums, even if the photos are only of themselves. Why to people go to a reunion? Is it really to catch up with old friends, or more to remember who they used to be? And why can’t we be multiple things to multiple people? I’ve been thinking recently whether I collect other people, or whether I allow myself to be collected. Even worthless junk can become priceless in the hands of the right collector.

There’s no doubt in my mind that all of the above confirms everything I have assumed about the narcissistic relationship agenda that I discuss at length in my book When Love Is a Lie. In the third and final article in this series,  What is the Narcissist Really Thinking (Sociopath Series Part 3/3), I’ll offer content from this same blog that answers other questions we have about what narcissists and sociopaths think, how they “feel” about themselves, how they live without a moral compass, and so forth.

Seriously, you can’t make this stuff up (or can they?)…..

 

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31 Comments

  • Jeana Boutwell

    December 9, 2015 at 3:21 pm Reply

    I have read so much on this and it all sounds to familiar. I don’t know how to get over and move on and have a life again. Two years together and the last year my N has been in prison and Its been the worst thing in my life and Tha says alot. He ripped mu entire life and famity apart so much that everytime I walk out the door my family expects I Wont return and that when he gets out in may he will kill me…all I can come up with is that he loved me more then anyone else ever has…I wonder if I am as sick as him..I am not myself anymore, I have no joy, I just have isolated myself in my room and only venture out to visit him…hundreds of dollars for calls and he still controls me..if I’m anywhere but home he will hangup and say it’s done a d call back later just to do it again…what do I do? I’m tired of hurting but I can’t stop it.

    • Zari Ballard

      December 20, 2015 at 2:33 am Reply

      Hi Jeana,

      Thank you for writing and it hurts me to ready just the little you wrote. You are allowing this guy to control your every move when all you have to do is change your number or not answer the phone. You didn’t say when exactly he was getting out but I’d keep an eye on that and then get a restraining order right before his end date to be served to him he’s walking out of the prison. Or move. Everything that’s happening is because you are allowing it. What are you so sad about? When narcissists go to jail for any length of time, that is GOOD NEWS. It’s a sign to get your shit together and – hell- the Universe even removed him from the situation! You say he RIPPED your entire life and family apart…again, what are you so sad about? HE’S IN PRISON! Go out, get a job, enjoy your life…fuck him and his pathetic controlling phone calls from fucking jail. Perhaps you’re mistaking his control for love? Sorry, it’s not even close. Narcissists and sociopaths don’t have a clue what “love” is so to say he “loved” you is delusional. He controlled you and he’s still controlling you and you allowed it. Stop visiting. Stop answering the phone. Live your life.

      I don’t know what else to say to you…only YOU can fix this and you better do it now while you have the chance. Build your confidence up so that you can deal with this idiotic felon BEFORE he even gets out – restraining orders or moving or SOMETHING. Go be with your family…open up to them. You deserve to be happy and he’s never gonna do it for you. His “bad” is as good as it’s going to get – ever. If you can, read my book When Love Is a Lie because it will empower you to make the right choices. Give yourself a chance.

      Stay strong and always know that I’m here to support you…

      Zari xo

  • Felicia

    October 11, 2015 at 11:41 am Reply

    Your book and website has been a life saver for me, Zari. Ive been dealing with the N for over 4 long years. He totally blindsided me with his charm and future faking. Now I know literally everything he said to me was a lie and he never followed through with anything he promised. I never knew anything about him. He wouldnt allow it. He would avoid questions or start the word salad everytime i asked him anything personal. All he would ever say when i asked what he was doing was that he was working or going to bed for the next day of work. I never knew his friends family or coworkers. He was so convincing about his feelings for me in the beginning I fell hook line and sinker. He talked about living together marriage and how much he loved me all the time but there was never any action.

    After the first year he moved 250 miles away so then i really couldnt track him. Of course he chose me because i am a married woman and 14 years older than him and it was kept a secret. We would meet at night or for an overnight, that,s it. He could come and go so much easier that way since we were a secret. I got the silent treatments, the hoovering, the triangulation and especially the cell phone game. Almost the entire affair were conversations (mostly texting) from that fucking phone!! 2 years in I starting backing off and he started hoovering even more. Ive only seen him twice in the last 2 years but just cant seem to keep him blocked from my phone. How stupid that this is the strongest attachment. I would do good for a few months then unblock him just to see if he was gone for good. Its like he could sense it and within a few days would be contacting me again. All he ever wants to do is meet up or have me leave my life behind.. my family…my good job my friends…mainly destroy my life to move in with him and basically be his slave. The last conversation we had was a nightmare. He was so disrespectful and degrading it made me sick. Called me a bitch 4 times. So I finally called him and asked him to answer honestly if he ever really wanted more than sexual relationship with me. He hesitated and tried to turn the conversation around on me. You know, asking a question with a question! Then he said he wanted me to be there when he got home in our kitchen, we,d go for walks and to the store and spend holidays together and of course the main one is i would be in his bed. Then he tried to tell me he’s had many girls (gag-heard it before) i got stern with him and said “what’s your point?” He blew up and started spewing obscenities and his nastiness at me. I hung up on him then texted him and said thanks you answered my question, dont ever contact me again and that he’s the sorriest excuse for a man as I’ve ever met and I despised him.

    God help me this time that i can let him go and stay NC. It is truly like letting go of a horrible addiction! That’s the way they like it. Ugghh!!

    • Zari Ballard

      October 23, 2015 at 3:47 pm Reply

      Hi Felicia,

      Thanks you for sharing your story, girl, and you are so much better off without this bastard. Don’t think for a minute that he actually wanted you to leave your family but even if he did (and you did it), imagine the nightmare of a life you’d be having right now. A narcissist only wants what he wants and that’s your suffering. If your not suffering, it’s just no damn fun. For this reason alone, it all must end. THE INSANITY MUST STOP AND ONLY WE CAN STOP IT. As you know, he will hoover here and there until the end of time just to keep you in the queue. It’s a waste of life, time, and anything else in our life that we care about. A narcissist will take it all without an ounce of remorse…and then blame YOU for the fact that he did it.

      Keep reading and staying educated and write anytime. I apologize for taking so long to get back to you. Stay strong, sister, and always know that I’m here to support you:)

      Zari xo

      • Felicia

        October 28, 2015 at 7:26 am Reply

        The hardest thing for me has been letting go. Even though my logical mind knows this guy is an extreme narcissist and BPD I can’t quite cut the cord completely. I’m getting closer every time I don’t do what he wants and his true colors come through. I almost considered meeting with him again until We spoke on the phone for the first time in a couple months and as always he barely has time to talk and has to hang up to take calls then call me back just end the conversation anyway. If he’s not talking sex in bed with his euphoric voice and his hand on his dick he just has nothing to say in a normal conversation except that he just went to work or left work or is at work and is pulled off in a parking lot to talk. He got furious when I texted him after we hung up that I do not want to meet with him again. Told him he barely has time for me anyway. He called back immediately and started spewing his venom about how there is something wrong with me and my brain and how he is the one who always contacts me and can’t understand why I reacted like that after our “nice” conversation. When said he loves my son and doesn’t want to lose him too it finally registered. He doesn’t love me and he probably never did. It’s all words. How could he love my son, he only met him once when this started 4 years ago. I know he’s a liar, a cheat and one of the most evil individual’s that I have ever encountered. But I feel like he got his wish with me because it’s like an addiction I can’t shake. That’s what he wanted and I realize I’m dealing with something bigger than me. I don’t know how to get out. I really don’t. ????

        • Zari Ballard

          December 6, 2015 at 4:19 pm Reply

          Hi Felicia,

          Girl, he sounds so much like my ex. I was with mine for 13-years and every so often he would throw out that me and my son were his “family”. Oh yeah, right, is that how you treat “family”??? Makes me sick. Send an update so I can know how your getting along.

          Stay strong, sister! I’m here to support you:)

          Zari xo

  • Amanda

    October 8, 2015 at 6:19 am Reply

    What if the ex narcopath doesn’t ever come back..? Even when I have tried to and have offered much narc supply. He always shoots me down. Could it be cuz we live 400 miles apart, it was a LDR. And his sons mom has a trust fund and I think he targets her the most because she offers the most benefits, being readily available cuz she lives in his city and money. So he doesn’t need me anymore. But wouldn’t he try sometimes to get some NS out of me..? Or is it because I am needy, clingy to him so I am just too much work for him.? I’ve always been confused why he has never hoovered. Maybe because I never gave him a Chancr to because I always initiated contact

    • Zari Ballard

      October 9, 2015 at 7:13 pm Reply

      Hi Amanda,

      If he’s a narcopath, why would you want him back? There may be many reasons that an N doesn’t hoover and long distance may be one of those reasons. The fact that you are always hoovering him may be another. It’s hard to tell. It could also be that the relationship is simply over…that he has moved on, went back to a former girl/wife/baby momma. Relationships do end just because they end.

      Don’t forget that there’s a fine line between a narc and someone who’s just an asshole. Maybe this guy was just an asshole and not a narcissist, per se, at all. Either way, please don’t spend a whole lot of time worrying about why he didn’t behave in this bad manner or that bad manner. The point of all of these blogs and books that survivors write is to discourage you from wanting him back. In other words, we’re not so much worried about why he didn’t hoover…we actually go No Contact so that he doesn’t even get the opportunity! Please don’t miss the point, sister…

      Stay strong and move on. Don’t waste a minute more of your precious time!

      Zari xo

  • Carolene

    September 10, 2015 at 6:11 am Reply

    In the article of the sociopath exposes the Narcissist part 3/3 were he is explaining why he does not act the same as others people, the sociopath makes the statement that quote ” if the human race were to erased from the face of the earth, that the sociopath would still be just fine with out the human race. Here the sociopath is admitting that he and those like him are not human. I have been saying all along that these creatures are not human, because God does not make human to be sociopaths and them expect them to act humanly. After reading what the sociopath explained to us about it’s self, I can understand him or it now, first it is not human like us in any way shape or form this is what you need to understand, and that there is another species in the world that looks like us humans but it is something altogether different from us. And it is hostile to humans and only look for and make it possible for the destruction of the human race, it even described itself as being more animal like and not human, and lets face facts here we have a creator, God who made man in his image, and who gave man the capacity to love and care about his fellow man and to have empathy. But satan has a race of people here on earth as well and they are the tares in the bible, the children of satan and lets not forget that Eve had paternal twins, one son was Abel who was the son of Able and the other son was Cain the son of Satan. Maybe reason it is so hard for people to believe that such creatures as the Narcissist and the Sociopath and the psychopath really exist, is because most people don’t believe in Evil, and they don’t believe in God and the Bible. So how can you understand the nature of the evil of the sociopath when don’t read the bible for understanding for explanations of what is going on in our world. Reading a few verses won’t give you understanding or going to a church that does not explain the bible to you verse by verse won’t enlighten you either, let me give you an example. In the garden of Eden when it speak about Eve eating the apple and giving it to her husband to eat also, how many of you know that this means that Satan seduced eve, which mean he had sex with her and she gave sex to Adam as well this is how Eve conceived paternal twins, one by Adam and one by Satan. and yes a woman can conceive by two different fathers in the same period of time, you can research this fact. Why did Satan seduce eve it was because he wanted to pollute the line or linage of Jesus Christ, so he would not be born or maybe be born corrupted. This is why the line came from adam’s third son and not from Cain. As long as the human race refuse to acknowledge God and the Bible they will always wonder in ignorance at the Evil of this world, and wonder and be amazed at the evil that some people can do to others, but these evil people are human, just like this Sociopath explained to you. Read what it said again and get a good understanding what it is saying to us, it is saying that the sociopath is not human and it don’t want to be human and that it hates humans, and it loves doing so. In reference to the Bible, who in there hate humans and vowed to destroy humans, was it not Satan, and he put his children here on earth to get that job done. You will never hear from a phsicharitrist that you are dealing with demonic behavior when you are dealing with a Sociopath, or Narcissists or a psychopath, because in the arrogance of the Mental Health field they have sought to keep God and the Bible out of the picture, because they think of God as a myth and believe that most people do also. But as long as people won’t acknowledge God and get an understanding of what he saying to them in the Bible you will forever be set upon by devils like Sociopaths and Psycopaths and Narcissists, and you won’t understand what you are dealing with and that it is a spiritual battle that you can’t win with God. That Sociopath/Devil is telling you the truth about itself, but don’t expect it to tell you exactly who and what it is, because the greatest trick that devils have played on the human race is to make you believe that they just don’t exist.

    • Zari Ballard

      September 12, 2015 at 8:18 am Reply

      Now, Carolene, ya gotta be careful about being too preachy! LOL

      I’m fairly certain that we all know what we’re dealing with and what evil lies within. However, my take on the Narcissist & Sociopath is that these particular human beings are basically two of God’s few mistakes. Imagine an assembly line of humans all getting hearts and souls and emotions like empathy and sympathy and love and so-forth. Well, the narcissist and sociopath are the flawed body products…the kind that gets picked off the assembly line and tossed to the side. Eventually, they make it out into the world but without all the good stuff. problem is…because they’re not empaths (emotional humans), they view the world through a very objective lens and this is actually a weird little gift and it’s how they get to be so good at learning to mimic the emotions of the “others” to get what they want. Basically, they are nothing but frauds, con men and women, grifters, users…whatever you want to call them but they ARE human. And they can never be fixed because they never had what they needed to begin with. Maybe it’s a test for us, who knows? Either way, lets not give them too much power by presuming that they’re not of this earth. There are far eviler demons that we need to be worried about but that’s a whole nuther topic for a whole nuther blog! LOL

      Zari xo

    • Lisa

      October 1, 2015 at 6:24 pm Reply

      Carolene, I personally am not familiar with the theology on Satan having relations with Eve, however, I will study that. I do want to validate, and tell you, you have many insightful insights on the correlations of this subject and spiritual warfare. As I turn a question over to God….which was…how does the phycology of sociopath/narcissist being incurable relate to your word which says “with God all things are possible”? There is to much, and would take to long to share what all was revealed to me. In short it is demonically driven, as you know, and keeping strict boundaries, no contact if possible is ideal. We are to pray for the strong holds to be bound and cast down (including generationally), I personally also ask that He put a hedge of thorns between them, and who they seek to exploit. He emphasized the important armor we are to wear, and know well. This is one of the reasons we are to pray for our enemies. I thought I had a grasp on what it is to be a “prayer warrior” after all these years, I now understand I’m barely a kindergartener at most. Praying for their salvation, and, or those their lives come in contact with. Anyway, thank you for realizing that as wonderful psychology is a gift, and it so is, this is a spiritual battle to be recon with.

  • Helena Gleissner

    May 24, 2015 at 3:40 pm Reply

    I believe I’m a sociopath.

    • Zari Ballard

      May 27, 2015 at 2:28 pm Reply

      Why do you believe that and why do you want to share that fact on a website full of victims? If you are feeling unhappy and concerned about your feelings and behaviors, then you can’t be a sociopath. Sociopaths could care less about any of us and actually enjoy our suffering. Now, if you’ve made your statement for that reason and you’re here to try and inflict more pain, don’t bother.

      So, elaborate and maybe I can respond appropriately. I’m not into guessing.

      Zari

  • AJ

    May 7, 2015 at 9:50 pm Reply

    Hi,

    I have been doing a bit of research on this topic and came across this post. I want to tell you my story and get your feedback. I’ve changed the names for obvious reasons.

    My wife and I moved into a new city about 5 years ago. We sort of became the flavour of the month and befriended a number of parents at my children’s school. I even invested in a company of one of the parents and when things went south I sued him to get my money back. When this happened it caused a bit of a polarisation among our group of friends and we were supported by some and ostracised by others. One of our supporters seemed to go out of his way to get close to me. I thought he was just being a great friend. My wife was very impressed by his attitude but I was a tad cautious. Let’s call him Mr B.
    After a while Mr B became really interested in everything about me and my family. What we had, my qualifications, my successes and failures etc. he then asked me to go into a number of deals with him which I managed to avoid. I saw him a few times hanging out with my ex business partner and decided to pull back from him a bit.
    One day I wake up and I’ve got 4 missed calls from Mr B. I ring him and he asks me if I’ve seen the email. “What email” I ask. I then see an email he’s forwarded to me questioning my professional qualifications and generally deriding me. The amail comes from a false email address that contains my name and is sent to a bunch of parents at my kids school.

    That day I see Mr B and confide in him how angry I am. At the same time he tells me his wife has thrown him out and changed the locks. He can’t see his kids. He starts crying (not for the first time). I forget about my worries and comfort him. Even offering to let him stay at my place. A lot of what he told me wasn’t making sense.
    That night I send Mr B and a few other friends copies of my credentials and professional accreditations. Within 48 hours another more vitriolic email goes out admitting my credentials but asking questions about their validity. I am incensed and start to suspect Mr B because the email contains information which could only have come from someone who had seen the accreditation I sent out.
    I decide to call his wife. She is a professional woman of good standing. I ask her in confidence whether Mr B could be responsible for the emails. She breaks down tells me the truth about their relationship. That he had abducted the kids and demanded she sign everything over to him as well as the fact he was obsessed with me.
    I try to remain close to the guy and start breaking down his contradictions. He realises it and breaks contact and starts running me down to other people. I still don’t know what he has said to other people but there are a number of people who believe anything he says.
    Here’s where it start to get scary. I think things are settling down and try to put it behind us. I help his estranged partner with finding good representation (I’m a lawyer but not in family law) and my wife gives her emotional support.
    This guy by now has lost control over his estranged wife. He threatens he 1 day and she is attacked that night. The next day he is arrested and charged with offences which carry with them up to 21 years in prison. There are six charges and they are very serious.
    At this stage I am shocked but think maybe it’s a good thing because Mr B will be so caught up with keeping himself out of jail he’ll forget about me. How wrong I was.
    The anonymous email attacks step up and start to get bolder with emails now attacking my wife. My business partners are targeted now along with parents at the school. The police receive anonymous complaints accusing me and my wife of child abuse and assaults and fraud.
    Because I have always considered myself above bullying I decided to write to Mr B and tell him I knew it was him.
    Everything goes quiet for a month and then one day I get emails from friends and business associates asking me about a new social media account in my name which is again derogatory and awful. I have it taken down but next thing I know I’m on a dating website and then another email goes around my kids school.
    Push comes to shove and I finally decide enough is enough. I move my kids to a new school. I feel so much better. Then I get a phone call from the headmaster of my kids new school. He’s embarassed. He’s got an awful vitriolic anonymous letter. He would have destroyed it but he thought it better to let me pick it up. I get it. It’s awful but obviously written by this guy. Looking to be intelligent but coming off as crazy. The letter is sent to everyone from the headmaster to the police chief to local and national media to the prime minister (I’m not kidding).
    Frankly I’m not sure how to proceed. This guys court hearing is coming up in A month but nothing seems to slow him down. He is using a VPN and is extremely net savvy.
    I realise now emotional reactions feed Mr B’s addiction but my anger and frustration is palpable. I have lost a great deal of money. I have moved my family from a house to a high security complex. Frankly my wish for vengeance is only outweighed by my desire to protect my family. Not sure what to do. Thoughts?
    BTW the above is only a summary. The detail would take pages and pages more.

    • Zari Ballard

      May 16, 2015 at 8:44 pm Reply

      Hi AJ,

      So sorry it has taken me this long to respond. Your story has blown me away and literally made the hair on my neck go up. This guy is a full-blown sociopath and, indeed, extremely dangerous. I guarantee that you are not the first to have had this type of run-in with him so the first thing I would do is dig deep to find anything and everything you can about his background. I’ll assume that you’ve done that but if not, do it. I suspect that it would span at least a couple of states as he appears to be quite a capable grifter. The only way to go at this is, unfortunately, to beat him at his own game. And as for being net savvy, two can play at that as well but it all depends on how far down the rabbit hole you’re willing to go. On the other hand, a con man such as Mr. B relies on the fact that most victims aren’t willing to go down the hole at all and this is how they usually get away with their shenanigans. You may want to react differently than most victims, I do not know. This is truly a disturbing situation and the fact that you’ve had to move your children to another school and your entire family to another home is beyond comprehension.

      It is clear to me that Mr. B is a sociopathic con man and, as I stated, I have no doubt that there have been many, many targets in his “career”. Currently, his wife and children are victims and now you are as well. It is also clear to me (and this makes it more disturbing) that Mr. B doesn’t appear to be seeking anything other than ruining your good name since he obviously knows that you are NOT going to co-partner in anything with him business-wise or other. Now, I’m also a little curious about the ex-business partner since Mr. B was spending time with him just prior to the first email. Something about that bothers me although it would seem unusual that two sociopaths would just happen to meet and begin working together to ruin another person but you never know. Grifters usually work in small groups. You don’t mention whether the ex-partner was actually the guy that you took to court because if that is the case, then it’s possible Mr. B’s immediate “support” of your action was a set-up from the get-go with the ex-partner having full knowledge of what was to come.

      Now, aside from knowing about narcissism and sociopathy, there is also something else that I know quite a bit about (from research and from several “friends” that it has happened to) and that is gangstalking. It’s a very covert stalking activity that takes place at all levels of society, often with more than one perpetrator, and it is ruthless. I’m not saying that is what’s happening here but I have my suspicions. If that is the case, you will have your work cut out for you because it never ends until the “job” is done, whatever that may be to the perp. Hopefully, Mr. B will go to jail/prison and this will all end. If he does go to jail/prison and things still continue then, yes, I would have to say that you are what they call a “targeted individual” and are being gangstalked for reasons that never ever warrant it. Either way, Mr. B is definitely a sociopath who is out to control somebody whether it be you, his wife, or his children. Oh my….

      Look, I’m not an “official” expert on the subject but I am more than willing to provide more information (about sociopathy and/or gangstalking) based on what I know (if you should need it). However, I’m not sure that this website is the place to do it. Your situation, obviously, goes well beyond the scope of narcissism and therefore does not need to be seen by all who come here. My concern is also for your privacy and, considering the situation, there’s only so much that my website can provide, do you know what I mean?

      Having said that, I’m here to support you in any way that I can so please feel free to contact me at this link so we can connect via email AND/OR, better yet, please consider scheduling a phone consult with me so that we can speak one-on-one. I am more than willing to share what I know about this type of abuse (because it certainly is abuse) if you think it would be of help to you. I am very concerned about your situation and I hope that, no matter what, you will follow-up and let me know how things are going…..

      Regards,

      Zari

  • Tanya McHan

    April 21, 2015 at 3:32 pm Reply

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    • Carolene

      September 10, 2015 at 5:03 am Reply

      This is concerning Mr. B. I think that you should have never allowed Mr. B. to cause you to react to him, especially letting him cause you to move your family away from their home because you feared for their lives, when you could have contacted the police and at least gave them the name of Mr. B. and your reasons why you believed that it was he that was harassing you. Because a sociopath and a Narcissist rarely want to commit murder, and I believe they mostly harm the people in their family because they feel they can get away with it. You showed this Mr. B. that you were afraid of him and that he had power over your life and decisions, by running away, and letting him know that you care too much about how others saw you and your family. This is what gave him the power to hurt you, you should have let Mr. B carry out the threats, of trying to ruin your reputation, and had faith in those who knew your character to stand by you and not believe anything that he said. or at the least let your character speak for itself among those in your circle and those whom you meet. you can’t change what people say about you or your family, but you can refuse to allow monsters to have this kind of control over your life, and you could have done this by ignoring the email and explaining to the persons who he sent them to, that this is a mentally challenged person, and even given them some information about what he has done to his own family, then no one in their right minds would take Mr. B. seriously. You can’t run from crazy hateful people, if you do they never stop the harassment because they have learned from you that it works.

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